Saturday, July 21, 2007

The Danger Of Becoming Too Professional!

First let me tell you that I feel like Ms. Trew, the nurse practicioner that I see, and Misty, who usually tries to take my blood for the labs, are two of the wonderful people in my life these days. They show so much concern and compassion. However, I am a little confused.

When I talked to the nurse about my viral load, which was down from 7.2 million to under 200,000, I was disappointed that she didn't express great joy and excitement about the results. When she told me the reading, I had to pause and calculate the numbers in my mind, and then she said very matter-of-factly, something like, "What we have is a viral load of......." It sounded to me like, "Well, we didn't knock it all out in the first 13 weeks. You still have this much viral load." I'm listening and wondering and thinking, "Well, isn't that good? The reading was to be less than about 700,000 and it was less than 200,000. Am I missing something here?"

I called 'Be In Charge' and got some support for my thoughts, that the doctors and nurses just do not want to influence our decision as to wheather or not we continue the treatment. If they show too much excitement and I choose to go on with the medication, and then it fails....., well, they may feel that they have put themselves in jeopardy.

Is there anything wrong about wanting the doctors personal opinion. He is well educated in the field and I am a dummy. He is a specialist. I'm a 'jack-of-all-trades and master-of-none". Besides, I'm paying the doctor a ton of money. Yes, it's the insurance that's paying, but if I buy a new car, I want some sound advice about that car. I have bought and paid for insurance. It doesn't belong to the doctor. It belongs to me. The insurance company is my advocate with the doctors, hospitals, pharmacies, etc. Yeah, I know. Sometimes it is hard to get the insurance company to pay up for us, but when they do, we should get what we have bought. I got instruction on a lot of stuff and I got a prescription. I go to the doctor's office once a month to let the nurse see that I am still alive and to give more blood and then I pay my co-pay and the doctor bills the insurance company for the rest. I go to the druggest once a month for my refills and again pay the co-pay and the pharmacist bills the insurance company for the rest of the huge price of this medicine. I give myself the shots and I take the pills. I struggle with extreme fatigue, flu-like symptoms, emotional rollercoasters, itching, mental stupaficity (that's a new word I just now created), and my hair is getting thinner and thinner.

What I want is for that nurse and all the staff in the office to have a party and celebrate with me.

I guess that would not be very professional for them.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I gander to say that 20 years ago the Dr. himself, with cigarette in mouth, would have come in and danced a jig with you to celebrate. But we live in a politically correct world now. Where emotion is a place where we can be sued and people won't finish their treatment, people and/or their insurance won't be there to pay and this puts the dr's and nurse's jobs in a very precarious position.
I miss the days of crudeness and honesty. I miss being able to have a true freedom of speech and be who I am. I miss that America has become a godless society who only seeks to serve herself.
oops...I am not being sensitive...Must go on YouTube and video a public apology...sorry.

Travelin' On said...

Hey bro.
Yeah, I'd say it probably has to do with a lawsuit somewhere. Sad isn't it?
BUT, oh well, we are rejoincing with you anyways!
I saw John at Bi-Lo last night and we were bragging about it at least to each other. :)
I love you.