Singing the Weekend Blues

Well, I guess it's about time I should be blogging. Sometime it's fun and sometime its not so much fun. Right now may be one of those time when I'd rather be goofing off, doing nothing really worthwhile but I feel a little obligation to let those of you who are interested know how I am doing. So here it is. I'm doing fine! That, said and done, "Goodbye."

No, wait. Wait just a minute. That seems kinda short and even a little rude. I'd better add a little to that so it will be 'more better.' Okay. So, what do you want to hear about. What shall I say. Shall I tell you about my experience Sunday, or about the one Monday? Surely you don't want to spend a lot of time reading a boring blog, so I'll try to spice it up a little.

My last shot was on Wednesday the 9th., and I am scheduled to take another one tomorrow night, Wednesday the 16th. The last one, seemed to be having hardly any effect on me. Saturday, Janis and I planted some flowers that Tammy sent to her mother for Mother's day, and I also did a little hedge trimming and as a result, I pretty well wore myself out. No problem! We got out baths, went to bed and arose to a beautiful Sunday morning. We got ready, rushing at the last minute as usual, left the house, got in the car and began to buckle up and do our thing for the ride to church. It so happened that I brought some ....... well, let's see ....... maybe I should just say, 'men and women don't always think just alike.' I bet (oops! I'm not supposed to bet), but you knew that about men and women, didn't you? Long story Short. I got so upset with Janis that I was trembling. And the crazy thing about it is that it was over some little ole thing that didn't amount to very much. I wanted to do it my way and she wanted me to think about it first. As a result, I was depressed all day long. Well, I thought when I got to Sunday School, Momma will just think it was my medicine working on me. Sure enough, I believe that was what she thought. I didn't want to talk to anybody. I just wanted to go home and lay down and feel sorry for myself, but No! We were having a Mother's day dinner at Bonita's and of course I must go to that. I wasn't hurting physically, so I really couldn't stay home justifiably. Maybe the medicine was working.....by now anyway. I began to notice that I was stuck in that valley of depression. I spent the rest of the day there and thought maybe by morning I'd be OK.

Monday, was the same. I was still just as upset as an old wet hen. I just slept most of the morning. Along about 11:30am, I decided that I'd better go to the RX and get my medicine refilled. I called Fred, and invited myself over to visit with him and Frances because I needed to talk to somebody. Thank God for a good family - for my brothers and sisters. Frances insisted that I eat dinner with them. After talking with them a little while and letting my tears burst forth, I dried my eyes and we ate dinner. Fred and I talked more. I began to feel better somewhere along the way and by the time Janis returned from school, I was doing much better. Still, had some emotions pent up, but I was coming out of that valley. Boy! It's like I fell into that valley and couldn't get out. Thanks Fred and Frances and most of all thanks to God.

As I said, I will have to give myself another shot tomorrow night. The aggravating thing about this is, my symptoms are not consistent. I mean, once I had a terrible itchy rash. Once, it was an elated feeling. About three times it has been a crying spell. And overall, it's been a pretty constant battle with fatigue and it seems that my body must be confused. My understanding was that the side effects would be most prominent within the first 8 to 12 hours and after two or three days I should be back to normal. That is not the way it is working. I am noticing the side effects after about two or three days, and then they last about two or three days. That means about Saturday, Sunday and/or Monday is my worst days. That is not the way I would have done this if I was in control of things. Since when did I think I was in control anyway. I gave up control when I was born and Momma and Daddy was in control. I gave up control when I joined the Air Force and Uncle Sam was in control. I gave up control again when I married my wife. Right!? Well, maybe she gave up control too, but if that's so, then whose in charge? Most significantly, I gave up control when I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Master and 'He has everything under control'. Now, I like that.

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I guess this blogging is doing its therapeutic work. I may have to borrow your sympathetic ears again in a few days---but until then, "my heart will go on singing".